PB: OMG you are so hyper...You have verbal diarrhea! PB: Is this what happens when you don't talk to me for 8 days?
Me: Don't make fun of my ADD!!!
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Conversation
Lauren: You never take me to the hot secret places! Me: Well trash usually stinks up those joints... Jus' sayin'.
Lauren: YO!
Me: Yea?
Lauren: FUCK YOU.
Me: http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3209/3030134436_81b6820cb1.jpg?v=0
Brian: Did you know the welsh flag's got a RED DRAGON on it? Badass. Me: I forgot which African country it is, but one of them has an AK47 in their flag. That's pretty badass too.
Me: Mozambique.
Reference:
Me: I'm looking at that URLMe: Is it safe for work? N: lol N: Yea N: Whatever you guys have stripper elmos come into your office Me: Stripper GORILLA
BP: Do you have Trivial Pursuit by any chance?Me: No... BP: Ok. Me: I have Ho Pursuit.
Lauren: I can DO platonic sleepovers. Me: Well yea, girls can do platonic sleepovers. It's really a matter for us guys.
CE: You're not going to be in LA this Wednesday are you? Me: I think I was supposed to, but no.
CE: No!
Me: Yea.
CE: The Hills is filming at my boss's sushi restaurant this week and we are going to dinner there. You were totally on my short list of invites.
Me: Oh man. I hate my life.
Rachael: I swear, macs might be virus-proof, but Dells seem to break less often. Me: Dells and PCs die a slow drawn out death.
Me: Macs flame out spectacularly.
Brian: Wow. That [Typeracer] game is fun. Brian: Strangely meditative in the most office-like way.
Me: Yea. And it makes it sound like you're typing something important.
Brian: Seriously. Crazy important. Better: It makes me feel that I am too!
Me: Yes, especially when you get done typing a quote from a decent book.
Me: I'm cruising around 92 wpm.
Me: I'm not sure if I win or not.
Me: I think I lose.
Me: I think that's information I never tells girls.
Brian: It's confusing. Sometimes that's a good move.
Me: Where you off to? Anonymous: Uh....Dominican--
Anonymous's girlfriend: You can tell tell them.
Anonymous: Cuba.
MC: Vegas baby... Vegas MC: Strippers on the plane... Blog update to come... Handjobs offered and declined.
Me: WHAT?
Me: The legendary stripper plane...
J: Quick!! Word association! Warm semi-summer nights... Me: Mosquitoes.
J: Booooooooo Alaska boy.
Me: Sad that Loving woman died. I've been thinking about her all day. I wonder if I would have the backbone to fight the way she did if I was in her shoes. L: Yah.
Me: She made it possible for you to get with them Russians and Germans.
L: lol. SHUT UP.
DC: How long do I wait to change my Facebook relationship status? Me: Hahaha.
K: Eating kimchi for breakfast! Me: Did you hook up with some Korean girl last night?
P: Aquaman sucks. Me: SHUT UP.
P: He's the weakest superhero ever.
P: He can talk to dolphins and whales. A lot of good that is.
Me: SHUT UP. Best never go near the ocean.
P: Dude, I'm from Michigan. The best Aquaman could do there is round up some killer clams.
P: Help me river trouts!
Me: He'd send killer lobsters!
P: Iron Man would grill them.
Me: Iron Man is a little whiny bitch.
P: At least Namor could fly.
Me: "Ohh, I can't hold my liquor." Iron Man is weak sauce.
P: Dude, Aquaman's hair always looks exactly the same wet and dry.
Me: At least he never had a MULLET.
P: What's wrong with mullets, Alaska boy?
Me: Just sayin'. Mullet boy, just sayin'.
Me: Hope your boy enjoys AA.
P: Aquaman would freeze in Alaska.
P: If you were in Alaska and needed help, Aquaman wouldn't make it past Juneau.
Me: Aquaman would send whales to help me.
Me: Iron Man would be drunk in some cabin.
Me: After two beers.
P: This is dumb.
P: Silver Surfer is the best.
Me: YES.
...
P: Emma Frost is the hottest chick in the comic universe.
Me: WHAT? WHAT?
P: That's one of her super powers. To be mega hot.
Me: Her white hair reminds me of grandmothers.
P: You're super retarded.
Me: That's one of MY superpowers.
Me: So you going out this weekend? MC: Yeah, going out
MC: Heading to a party with some coworkers tonight
MC: I asked if i could bring the girl i'm dating
MC: They said "Yes, but there will be lots of hot girls there, are you sure you want to bring sand to the beach?"
Me: Just ping me when you want to grab lunch. C: You need a technology detox.
C: No laptop.
C: No cell phone.
C: Just go away for a few days.
Me: Does not compute.
DC: My quasi-girlfriend told me all my clothes had holes in them and made me go buy new clothes with her... DC: they really look nice...
Me: That's what girlfriends do.
DC: Sometimes it takes a woman's touch.
Me: Maybe you only listen to women.
Scene: Friend "L" struggles to finish her shot of Patron. By struggle I mean, it took her three attempts, plus four limes, plus adding some mixer of water to the shot, plus the moral support of yours truly as well as a stranger sitting at the bar. Afterwards: Me: When I said shots, what kind of shot were you expecting?
L: I dunno! Something like skittles shot!