Viewing entries tagged
Dating
Me: And did she know about you two...? Bob: Yea! I mean it was just like one date, but what's great about this girl is that she already knew about my past [hook-ups] prior to us getting together-
Me: So you don't have to hide anything?
Bob: Exactly.
Me: Well, that's awesome, man. And you like her?
Bob: Yea.
Me: Just don't fuck it up by fucking her sister.
Bob: Yea.
Bob: She doesn't have a sister.
*Names changed to protect identity.
New York Magazine sent writer Neel Shah out about town during Fashion Week with a mission: Hit on tall leggy models. How'd he do at the Prada party?
May Andersen, Elite Neel: [Sidles up] So how about you and I get away from all of this? St. Barts this weekend? May: I only travel with people I know, sorry. Neel: I think we've met before. May: I don't think so. Neel: Are you sure about that? Wasn't it François's party in Bridehampton? May: [Turns away] Neel: Okay, this isn't going so well. Let's start over. How do I get you to come home with me? May: I'm the wrong person for this. I'm a huge bitch [laughs]. I never get "picked up." I like to be the one who pursues. Neel: Well what if I were superrich? May: It's a start.
Neel buddy, she's not even worth it. May doesn't like sushi. Don't tell her this but that's pretty much why I broke up with her. How can someone not like sushi?! Terrible.
Read rest here.
[Via]
I've never been more ill in one winter than this year. I have a few theories that could explain this (Memo to self: Stop making out with skanks. I kid, I kid.), but I am solidly sure about one thing and that is this: I'm really ready for winter to be over and done with.
Anyway, back to what you are here for, which is links to things that will amuse, entertain, and occasionally educate you while avoiding your work duties. And I have a link ("plug" for a friend) that will hopefully provide all three.
One of the most erudite friend of mine has caught the blogging bug and has started maintaing an entertaining blog (metrocardsandcondoms.wordpress.com) that presents his grand unifying theories and penetrating analysis on dating, sex, and relationships, along with an occasional insight into his neuroses. The writer intends for it to be a roundtable discussion, if you will, with each entry providing the proverbial launch pad or diving board.
Cheers.
Remember in Jerry McQuire McGwire McGayer Mcguire(Thanks Google) after his client Ron Tidwell has that huge performance on Monday Night Football (WOOOO! SHOW ME THE MONEEEEEAYYYYYYYYYYY) and an excited Jerry calls his 'wife' Dorthy Boyd and tells her about what a huge night he had, they had, their company had?
That non sequitur aside, last night my roommate Chris aka C-Low and I decided to upgrade our status from "roommate" to "friend." What does this mean for the future? It means that we no longer have to introduce each other to our friends like, "Hey, meet my roommate Chris," but now I can say "Meet my friend Chris." Although, if I'm mad at him because he didn't do the dishes, or because he let Luca shit in front of my door, I'm going to introduce him as my roommate.
I feel that my relationship with my third roommate Kristin aka D Train was upgraded a long time ago. I think she's my friend now and no longer justaroommateIfoundoffCraigslistIlikegatorade. But...this is New York and in New York, relationships are a particularly fickle creature (Totally channeling Sarah Jessica Horseface from Sex and the City right now...wow...I'm having an out of body experience right now...who is this person typing at my computer...), and unless both parties explicitly have an unequivocal discussion--with lawyers and court reporters present--about the status of their relationship (Roommate, Friends, Dating, Open Relationship, Relationship, Random Play, Swinger, Married, Divorced, or Networking Only) and come to an agreement, then their relationship status forever remains abstruse, ambiguous, and even chimerical. One party might think s/he is in a Relationship, while the other party might think s/he is in it for Networking Only. Ouch. So I think I need to have a sit down with D Train and find out where she and I stand. Just roommates (boo!) or friends (yay!)?
As for the apartment resident dog--spoiled brat extraordinaire aka the little guy--Luca and I like to tag team pillows (he takes the back and I take the front), which makes us practically BFF.
Update: So the prescient statement I made above over a year ago is that relationships are a fickle creature in New York. Having to step over an untrained and un-housebroken dog's piss and feces every morning, day, and evening; smelling cigarette smoke every morning, day, and evening; and trying to deal with unreasonable messiness and hoarding in the common spaces is a whole heap of straw that broke this camel's back. I just want her to give me back my security deposit now.
I think the people that participate in this event pretty much deserve one another. There's a speed dating event next week where the requirements for participants are such: Guys, be rich and girls, be hot. How rich? Like a minimum of $200,000 salary (more depending on age), assest over $1 million, and at least a $4 million trust--with documents to back it up.
And the prospective girls must submit 5 photos for 'hotness' review.
Sweet. A killer stock portfolio and glamour shots. That is love.
Check it out here.
