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AN AMERICAN IDIOT

I would find this image hysterical until I realize that when politicans say "my fellow Americans" it includes idiots like this Texan (natch) woman, pictured here protesting amnesty for illegal immigrants on the argument according to her sign that illegal immigrants are...anti-English Language. Her message is that the ability to speak and understand English is like a contemporary Voight-Kampff test, which is used in the film Blade Runner to distinguish between "real" humans and replicants, except here it's used to distinguish between real "Americans" and the Others. The English language/Voight-Kampff test distinguishes real humans/Americans (presumably for this protester, real Americans are also of a whiter hue) from replicants/immigrants. It's a frighteningly dehumanizing logic. Please call me out if you disagree. [Memo to self: Re-watch Blade Runner and try to construct a comparative relationship between it and the debate and rhetoric surrounding the immigration issue.]

People: I cannot state this enough. If you are going to insist on trying to establish English as the "official" language here in the US then by golly at the very least make sure your spelling is on point at your rallies and protests! I personally think that that inverted exclamation point at the beginning of a word in Spanish is pretty badass. ¡I would like to see a bit more of that!

Back on the soap box after the jump.

I dislike the phrasing "illegal immigrant." Robbing the Dunkin Donuts in Penn Station is illegal. Putting a muay thai elbow to the head of a guy standing in front of you at the bar because he didn't hear you when you said "Excuse me--I need to use the restroom" is illegal. Feeding Funions, as delicious as they may be, to the police horse is illegal (I think). Running away from the cops after pouring your drink on them is illegal. But just...being here in this country is illegal? I don't like the connotation. I prefer something like "unofficial immigrant." Or what about plain ol' "immigrant?" But I don't like that either. No one calls the gal who just moved here from England or Sweden an "immigrant." It's a safe alternative word that implies a certain ethnic, cultural, or religious background that is decidedly non-white.

At the end of the day, it's all just a matter of paperwork and whom you know. Sure, it's a matter of semantics, but semantics matter. And on this point I think the protester and I would agree.

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