Me: Just ping me when you want to grab lunch. C: You need a technology detox.
C: No laptop.
C: No cell phone.
C: Just go away for a few days.
Me: Does not compute.
This guy sends in his faulty Dell laptop to the company's tech support so they can send him a new one. That new replacement arrives with a little something extra on it/in it. That something extra is curly and pubical. Speaking of Dell, last we heard back in 2007 the Dude Dell guy from all those commercials way back when now works at a Tortilla Flats mexican restaurant in NYC. Although it's not all terrible, he also still gets gigs on TV, film, and the stage. I would just closely check your tamales if you dine there to make sure there isn't a little something extra on your plate. Disgusting Dell laptop photo after the jump.
[They] get burned up when they hear about someone buying a bottle of mouthwash with food stamps. But they love big water projects. They only object to nickle-and-dime welfare. They love it in great big gobs.
- Marc Reisner, Cadillac Desert
My future dream apartment (in Grammercy...or Soho...) will have these as coat racks:
It reminds me of the "Finer Things Club," but some people here in NYC have formed an open membership club called "The Picnic Club." Its purpose? To have and restore picnics, with the first session to take place this Sunday. Weather permitting, natch. From their website:
Sunday, April 27 1 p.m. Sheep Meadow, Central Park Look for Allison and Michael, they will be standing with clipboards
And just like Fight Club, they have rules. But unlike Fight Club....you can tell people about The Picnic Club. Anyway, the rules for those of you park hooligans:
3. No loud music may be played; we must never impact another picnic-goer's experience in a negative way.
4. As an extension of rule 3, no gratuitous foul language, violence or nudity (we trust your taste on this).
5 . B.Y.O.'s: A picnic blanket and a "basket" of some sort must be brought. Failure to comply with this rule will result in you sitting on the grass in the middle of a group of members, but will not actually make you part of The Picnic Club. It's like sneaking into a Yankees game -- maybe you still get to see the game, but you'll feel really guilty and on edge the whole time.
More information on their website. I'm also a big fan of their sweet picnicking coat of arms. I want it on a white t-shirt.
Sean Avery, professional hockey player for the New York Rangers, will be working as an intern this summer over at the offices of Vogue. Presumably he didn't get either jobs with the Rangers or with the Vogue by browsing the job listings on MonsterTrak.com. He wrote a letter to Vogue editrix Anna Wintour in sum saying, "Yo Anna. Hit me up with a job."
But what does the person dubbed "the most hated man in hockey" for his style of play know about fashion? Well, quite a lot — Avery is a self-confessed clotheshorse who has been known to give girlfriends advice on how to dress, and in interviews has expressed a dream to become a fashion editor after his days on the ice (he'll likely be a big help clearing through the crush of shows). "He says that he prizes his black patent leather Yves Saint Laurent high-tops, 'a lovely cashmere throw from a friend who works at Calvin Klein' and his Philippe Starck machine-gun-shaped lamp," reports The New Yorker's Nick Paumgarten in this week's issue.
Avery recently made the sports headline news with this particular screen play during the playoffs this month against the rivals New Jersey Devils:
[youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=Ec_2oKWe2Gw]
I find Jeff Koons's contemporary pieces completely enthralling and mesmerizing like the eye candy that they represent. It was a highlight to see a collection of his pieces in LA and it really made an impact on me. I find myself randomly pondering it. So color me metallically excited to see that the Met is showing some of his pieces on their rooftop Cantor Roof Garden through the fall of 2008. The Times is disapproving and critical of the rooftop placement where the NYC skyline dwarfs the sculptures. And it's a good point, but I see eye to eye with them on this note:
Their setting aside, Mr. Koons’s sculptures remain intellectually and sensuously exciting objects — “Balloon Dog” is a masterpiece — and they are worth visiting under any circumstances.
Friends, if any of you are interested in hiking over to the Met to take a gander at this holler at me via email, facebook, myspace, twitter, pownce, leave a comment here, or call me on my mobile. Or send me a text.
I love what this NYC artist is doing with the street level subway grates--each time a train runs by the air gets pushed out into the street, which is annoying at best when you walk by and disgusting at worst with trash being tossed around. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mttu9M_BuJ0]
Back in the early stages of my blog here on Wordpress (after my move from Xanga and before that Blogspot) there was a fierce debate that took place on my friends' blog Chopstix which is also one of my favorite websites period on the Internets. The debate was over the "hotness" of a particular model, Jessica Michibata who also happened to maintain a photo-heavy blog. I discussed the issue here on my blog as well in full detail. Well, I want to revisit that controversy on the basis of that Ms. Michibata's most recent blog entry where she is indeed totally super hot. Oh, totally unrelatedly, the newest Economist issue has a nice piece on the charges of elitism leveled against Obama the past week.
This is currently my favorite muxtape on teh Internets right now. What is muxtape? It's a simple website allows you to upload your music and create your own online mixtape. You're too late: icouldbeyourboyfriend.muxtape.com is already taken.
Do send me what you've created and I want to post a listing of all the muxtapes created by my friends and readers. And then maybe we could have a vote on who is the best. The worst one would be kicked off the island.
This is my ridiculously amazing muxtape. I wouldn't even click on it because frankly, if my muxtape were a club YOU would not be allowed past the velvet rope.
DC: My quasi-girlfriend told me all my clothes had holes in them and made me go buy new clothes with her... DC: they really look nice...
Me: That's what girlfriends do.
DC: Sometimes it takes a woman's touch.
Me: Maybe you only listen to women.
Completely respectable and widely read Boing Boing informs me that a completely inappropriate video of the removal of a six-inch deoderant container from a 39-year-old male patient in the Philippines was posted on YouTube. I'm just the messenger folks. I'm not even attempting to look to see where this video is on YouTube or anywhere else on the World Wide Web.
Just passing on the word: A filmmaker acquaintance of mine directed a Barack Obama message for MoveOn.org's "Obama in 30 Seconds" contest where auteurs can create a 30 second Obama ad. Based on public voting, the winning ad will be aired nationally and the winner will receive a gift certificate worth $20,000 in video equipment. Check out Justin Lerner's entry in this competition.
If you like it, vote for him (click on link above)! Check out the other entries on the site.
On Sunday I was walking by a vintage shop near my apartment and I noticed this bag for sale outside the store. The tag said "Collector's item $20."
Nothing is so predictable in New York City on a warm spring day as lunch outside at Coffee Shop in Union Square.
Throwing a knuckleball for a strike is like throwing a butterfly with hiccups across the street into your neighbor's mailbox.
- Willie Stargell
Despite being under the Dayquil weather, my roommate dragged me to his girl's birthday party in Brooklyn. His reasoning: "After drinking you'll feel better anyway." Morning after update: I emphatically do not feel better at all today after drinking last night, but at the time it sounded valid and reasonable. Anyway, a couple pics. I had my friend Lea meet me there at the bar as it was near her apartment.
Lea digging through her purse to show us something from the latest issue of Vice. Warning: It's very aggressive and not safe for work or around grandmothers. More after the jump.
Bam! Vag Bag! Comment: I like how Lea bookmarked this page.
Scene: Friend "L" struggles to finish her shot of Patron. By struggle I mean, it took her three attempts, plus four limes, plus adding some mixer of water to the shot, plus the moral support of yours truly as well as a stranger sitting at the bar. Afterwards: Me: When I said shots, what kind of shot were you expecting?
L: I dunno! Something like skittles shot!
Wilco aka my favorite band is performing at McCarren Park Pool this summer in August. This is where if Wordpress would allow it I would upload and embed a couple of my favorite songs by this band to share with ya'll the brilliance that is
Wilco.
Nothing is so predictable in New York City on a warm spring night as a long motherfucking line at Shake Shack at 8 PM. It's as predictable as death and taxes.