HOW TO WRITE A SCI-FI ACTION SCRIPT

How to write a sci-fi action script as outlined by Cecelia over at FilmIndustryBloggers.

Deep in the [name an uninhabited jungle or galaxy] in an abandoned [name an additionally isolated location such as an oil rig or a logging station], a crack team of [name a division of the U.S. army] special ops is sent to rescue a missing detachment of [name a group of innocent civilians (ie nuns, orphans, the blind, blind orphan nuns, etc)], only to come up against a force that is [sub/super] human. After brutally murdering [Brick Wall/Slate/2×4], the tough [black/latino] member of the team, and maiming [Hard Drive/Motherboard/microChip], the group’s geeky operations strategist, the entity shows itself to be a terrifying [alien/science experiment] shaped like a huge, grotesque version of a [name a species of reptile, crustacean or mollusk] with a [name a sharp and/or slimy noun]-like mouth. The team’s fearless leader, [Wolf/Bear/Panther], quickly realizes that if he doesn’t stop the creature, no one will, and that perhaps this battle, in addition to saving the human race, will help him [atone for/work through some of lingering emotional issues from] his recent [divorce/wife’s death/brother’s drug overdose].

As Cecelia writes, since Aliens and Predator the vast majority of the sci-fi action scripts are derivative of those two movies. Although I think films like Cloverfield and comic book based movies (including Hellboy and the upcoming Watchmen) are filling that niche to a degree.

Read more here.

[Via]

GALACTIC EMPIRE INVADES SAN FRANCISCO

The Galactic Empire invades an indifferent San Francisco.

NEIL DIAMOND TO FINALLY PERFORM SWEET CAROLINE AT FENWAY

Neil Diamond is scheduled to perform at Fenway Park, home of the great Boston Red Sox, next Saturday. His song Sweet Caroline plays in the middle of the eight inning at every Red Sox home game and "has become the team's unofficial anthem and more: a rousing eighth-inning singalong-turned-musical totem whose propitious properties remain a mystery - even to the songwriter who the folks at Fenway have been trying to lure to the park for years."

"I'm not sure I understand it, but it's fun to sing along with and for me it's always been a good-luck song," Diamond says of his 1969 hit, whose popularity has hardly ebbed in four decades. "It's been around for so long, and I think that anybody who adopts it has some of that good luck. The fact that the Red Sox have adopted it proves the point."

Uh, really?

"I put home runs and good pitching in front of the song," he concedes. "But the song does capture the spirit of the team."

It's an odd association considering the song has nothing to do with baseball or the Red Sox. And no one seems to know the connection between their favorite team and this song by Neil Diamond. Turns out the person responsible for starting this entire tradition is Amy Tobey whose job from 1998 to 2004 was to create the playlist of songs to play during each game (SWEET GIG!). She noticed that Sweet Caroline was playing at other sporting events and decided to include it at Fenway. At some point playing the song became a superstition thing to her: Something that Red Sox fans are no strangers to. We can be a little edgy.

In 2002, when new management took over at the park, they requested that Tobey play the song during the eighth inning of every game. ''They liked it and they just loved the crowd reaction with it and stuff," she says. Though Tobey says she was nervous the change would be bad luck for the team, its appeal to fans ultimately ruled. And under the song's spell, the Red Sox last season won their first World Series in 86 years.

Read the rest of the interview with Neil Diamond here.

OLYMPIC ODDITIES

Ms. Bug Catcher-A small Chinese woman with a large net assigned to catch the moths during the evening beach volleyball matches, where the Ghostbusters theme song is played. In the same vein at the beginning of each water polo match the theme of Jaws is played. Also, the swimming and water polo events have...attending lifeguards on each end of the pool, "just in case, say, Phelps happens to be drowning." These and other "only at the Chinese Olympics" moments here.

PHOTO FINISH FOR PHELPS

Sports Illustrated has a great photo sequence of Michael Phelp's insanely narrow victory by 0.01 seconds over Serbian Milorad Cavicin (also a California-Berkeley graduate) in the 100m butterfly Men's swimming event. As they approached the wall in this "agonizingly close" race "Phelps realized he had misjudged the finish."

Most swimmers would have impulsively chosen to glide, but Phelps proved by the slimmest of margins what sets him apart. Following his instincts, he took an alligator-arm stroke and touched the wall. Cavic, a California-born Serb, hit the timing pad in full glide.

[Via]

PROFESSIONAL SKATEBOARDS FIGHTS FOUR GUYS

Professional skateboards Tony Hawk, Bam Margera and Mike Valley himself narrate and discuss the behind the scenes and more of the time Mike Valley, a UFC lookin' mofo, fought and destroyed four guys. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PV9mZy0zork&NR=1]

HOW TO GET INTO ANY CLUB

[Disclaimer: It appears to be a video created by Sprite and so despite the "hidden cam" it may all be a complete set up. But it's still a pretty solid concept.] This guy thinks he can get into any club by wearing requisite DJ gear (sunglasses, bright hoodie, and a record bag) and telling the bouncer that he is "playing tonight."

QUOTE

This is so high brow and so f—king smart, I clearly need a college education to understand this movie.' You know what? Fuck DC comics. - Robert Downey Jr discussing The Dark Knight.

VAMPY BUSH

Woa.

[Thanks Clay]

Update: Yesterday evening after I left the gym and headed to the subway in Union Square, I passed an old woman selling a t-shirt featuring the above graphic. That didn't take long.

BUILD YOUR OWN KALEIDOSCOPE

This is a pretty cool online tool that lets you create your own kaleidoscope.

IKEA-IZE YOUR NAME

Input your name to IKEAize it. Here's mine:

[Thanks Mun]

LOL: KEN LEEE KEN LEEE TULIBU DIBU DOUCHOO

My man at A Day in the Life Of slayed me with this video find of Idol reject singing KEN LEEEEE. I can never listen to this Mariah Carey song the same way ever again. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNQLmHKlmiE]

I want her to cover other songs. Or rather Ai wan er tooo cohver uder sungs.

LAST NIGHT'S PARTY: A DAY OFF & WILCO CONCERT

For a little R&R and to recharge the batteries I took Wednesday off from work. I also had a much blogged about here ticket to Wilco later that night. I slept in, lazied around, then headed to my favorite burger place in Park Slope: Bonnie's Grill.

Now that is a plate of delicious right there. I especially like their jalapenos touch to the burger.

Afterwards I stopped by the nifty small design store and drooled over this mirror again. Sigh. 700+ bucks. And then on my way home, I ran after the ice cream truck man. I haven't done that in awhile and he and I both had a good laugh over a grown man running like a fat kid running like the last ice cream bar in the entire world was in that truck.

Then I met up with Kzar to head early to McCarren Pool Park to wait in line to go see one of our favorite bands later that night, Wilco. Here's the industrial and worn entrance to the park.

Kzar was so amped he did a jump.

People waiting in line.

We were a little too early and the line wasn't that hectic at all. So we decided to kill a little time in Williamsburg. The streets were mainly empty as the hipsters were all still at work. I realized that maybe walking around with The Economist might not garner me any fans in Williamsburg. At a Wilco concert. I joked that I was going to wave my Economist around and talk loudly about my awesome severance pay from Morgan Stanley. "Man I love having a year's salary up front! All play every day! Am I right, or am I right? Woo! Wilco!"

I had actually finished it on the subway ride over, so I just threw it out.

Then we dropped into a restaurant for a drink and to hide from the sun.

Figuring it was time to wait in line like Star Wars geeks at a movie premier, we went back to the pool entrance. Kaizar found the spotchy grass comfortable apparently. This is what living in San Francisco does to you: You just end up not carrying if dirt and earth is stuck all over your shirt. Sad, really.

We cut the line and moved into an open space near the very front. I said to Kzar before making the move, "Don't look at anyone or make eye contact. Just move and sit down. These punks won't do anything." True. All he got was a dirty look--the first of many as we would learn later--from the girl sitting nearby. "Whatever babe, that's how we roll. Now get us a snack."

Bam! Exactly. "Thanks little darlin'."

Oooh, so artsy. Rusted fence, just like that around my heart.

Me: Yo: Are you seriously wearing wool f'n socks on a hot day like today?? Kzar: YUP!

Um, and I guess Kzar sabotaged my camera here and took a self portrait? For his Facebook?

THIS IS FOR THE SPANIARDS. LOOK AT MY CHINKY EYES. LOOK AT 'EM.

Hmm, I don't know. This shit looked pretty open to me. And not closed AT ALL.

Entering the pool area finally!

A TERRIBLE jump. Possibly one of the worst ever. I look like an Asian leprechaun doing a jig.

Kzar giving a much more respectable effort, demonstrating how he will do a reverse stage dive into the pit area later on. Note the blond girl on the right. More on her outrageousness later.

Lights, camera, music.

In the age of slim camera phones and digital pocket cams, we thought this guy was funny with his LEAST pocket friendly camera EVER. So we took a couple photos of it. I mean, dude, at that point, just pull the trigger and wear it around your neck. After Kzar snapped the second photo, the aforementioned blond girl angrily snapped her head to us and exclaimed, "Are you kidding me?" Kzar and I are totally confused and bewildered. She asked, outraged, "Are you taking a photo of my butt?" or some variation thereof. We stated that we were not only NOT taking a photo of her ass but that she wasn't anywhere in the photos AT ALL. And then we showed her the image playback as proof. Again, not only were we not taking a photo of her and she was also in none of the photos, but I didn't even notice her at all (as she fits under my "ambiguously shaped unmemorable anonymous white girl" category) until she opened her mouth. She continued to mutter to her embarrassed boyfriend (Sorry bro, you seemed like an alright cat). We tried to apologize and placate her by explaining what was amusing to us, and again showed her the camera playback. She looked. And then this, and I don't use this lightly, but because I found her so unreasonable at this point I'm going to go ahead and say-- fucking bitch, tried to escalate the situation by then tapping the camera guy, then pointed to us, and said "Those guys were taking a photo of your butt." Wow. This guy just thought it was funny and we joked about his camera. I don't even know how to conclude this story other than to say that she is the worst Wilco fan ever. And to that girl, if you ever see this: Get over yourself. You are not Amanda Cicchini, but we wouldn't try to sneak perv shots of her because she is a classy woman.

The opening act came out and she was surprisingly good. Notice the yellow shirted security guard in the front.

He was not feeling this girl, the fans, and later on Wilco at all.

Some of the guitars for Wilco. They used about 50 guitars it seemed through the entire show. I want one. And I would play the two chords I know on it over and over. And then the girls will like me. Right? Right? Hello?

Another guitar picture. Awesome.

Waiting in the front for the main act.

The waiting fans.

Some kid in crutches waving his crutch in the air.

Security guard taking a bow for initiating a "we are sick of waiting, come out" clapping round.

WILCO!!!

And the rest of the pictures are snapshots of the band throughout the night who ended up doing a double encore which was pretty neat. It was quite a treat to see them from the very front row in a venue such as McCarren. And the sound was unbelievable. Fantastic set and performance by my favorite non-hip hop group.

Nels Cline is pure undistilled energy on stage. 100 proof. He is frantic and yet completely in control. Amazing.

My favorite photo towards the end of the night of lead singer Jeff Tweedy.

The masses filing out into the night, uhm, subway. MRod Nation commenter Krunky Munky is somewhere amongst the crowds.

The End.

IF CELEBS MOVED TO OKLAHOMA

Blanket statements + celebrities + state stereotypes = If Celebs Moved to Oklahoma x hilarity Britney Spears

Cameron Diaz

Jennifer Aniston

Last one is really frightening. Only go on if you are truly brave or sickeningly curious.

Olsen Twins

I'd bet you a million bucks that if one of the celebrity gossip magazines made this their cover feature story (and included photoshopped recreations of other celebrities) that issue would sell gazillions. GAZILLIONS.

[Via]

RECREATE FERRIS BUELLER PARADE IN NYC!

Mina Karimi is looking for 600-800 participants ("agents") to help recreate the parade scene from Ferris Bueller during the Deitch Art Parade in Soho, NYC on September 6th.

I am recruiting secret agents in the audience of the parade to mimic the extras in the movie as my Ferris float approaches. In order to fully reproduce the spirit of the scene I will need at least 100 agents on each block of the parade to get the Ferris joy-ball rolling.

If you want to participate or have questions, e-mail Karimi per instructions: please email me at projectbueller@gmail.com for further details and instructions.

Subject line: “Ready and Willing” if you are ready and willing. “?” if you have questions. “!” if you have a comment. (I will only be opening the “?”s and the “!”s).

"LESS THAN DIMES" EXPLANATION

David Cho brilliantly distills and explains what the following slang means:

Less than dimes, get down every time.

Read more here.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY OF THE 2003 NORTHEAST BLACKOUT!

On this day in 2003, a massive blackout rolled across the Northeast resulting in one of the most memorable and dramatic 24 hour periods in the life of MRod.

• The law firm making us wait over an hour before letting us go home. Bastards.
• Walking down 40+ flights of stairs.
• Spending all my cash on 1 dollar pints at the Irish bar next door to my apartment in midtown.
• Scrounging through my coins and my (gone) roommate's coins so I could get enough money to buy food.
• Wishing my coworker good luck on his journey at midnight to try to find his way home to Long Island.

Feel free to share your story if you were (un)lucky to live through that experience.

[Thanks Paul for the reminder!]

Update: Cool! The Village Voice picked up on this entry!

MROD CARTOON: IF A TREE FALLS AND NO ONE IS AROUND TO HEAR IT DOES IT MAKE A SOUND?

By MRod.

ANOTHER SPANISH SPORTS TEAM MAKING SLIT EYED GESTURE

Following in the racist footsteps of their basketball counterpart, another Spanish team has a group photo of them pulling their eyes back and making the slit eyed expression. This photo, found on their team website by Gawker, was apparently taken after they beat China during the tennis 2008 Federation Cup.

No sponsor told them to do this, so what's this team's excuse? Probably that some of "their best friends" are "Chinese."

I experienced this sort of racism back in I think, 3rd grade from Paul during recess and once from a homeless, mentally imbalanced guy after I only gave him a couple dimes and pennies from my pocket.

So Spanish athletes who find this behavior totally acceptable and defensible: Should I treat and view you then like you are mentally imbalanced or like a little child?

Lastly, here's a gigantic middle finger and a big fuck you to all the athletes involved, sponsors, photographer, and their apologists. I'm far too classy to intentionally insult anyone, so if anyone is interpreting my middle finger directed at them as something inappropriate then they are absolutely confused because it is intended to be interpreted as somewhat loving.

Update: I do have to applaud the Spaniard in the pink sweater standing in the back of the team photo. He thought the Chinese just rocked hard.

[Thanks N]

DO YOU LIKE PEANUT BUTTER?

Anyone that has lived with me as a roommate or any other capacity know that I like peanut butter. I just do, okay. But this kid takes it to another level. And that level is the level I need to get to. The awesome level. Stat.

[Thanks Clay]